There are alot of things that leave me dumbfounded, and sometimes my head hurt from thinking why are they like that.


I wonder why some people cant live their lives with more responsibility.


Why cant the friend whom I was concerned about, who made use of my name without telling me in advance, cant tell me that things are already fine, leaving me to piece things together from the glimpses that I get occasionally.


I'm still upset about this, but he's already back in his happy world, making me wish that I wasnt even concerned in the very first place.




Why cant people turn off the lights when they leave the room, turn off the tv when it's not in use, refill the kimwipes when they have finished using it, refill the distilled water container when the container ran out of water, pour away the waste water in the beaker when it's full and not take it for granted that it's always empty.


Often, I have to turn off the lights, TV, refill the kimwipes, distilled water, pipette tips, pour away the waste water in the beaker 'cause it threatens to overflow, or in quite a number of cases, the water actually overflowed and made my bench so damn freaking wet, so I had to clean up the mess.


And these leave me totally annoyed. These arent my responsibility, but often you will be able to find me doing it 'cause I need the things that have ran out, or I couldnt take it anymore after waiting to see if the person will actually refill them/pour the waste water away.


But I have learnt something too: If they didnt do it for the first time, they won't do it no matter how long I wait for. It's useless. There's no point in being hopeful that "Hey! They might actually wake up from the bubble that they have been living in, and be responsible for the first time!"


If they are irresponsible, Kimberly, they will not metamorphize into responsible butterflies overnight, or in 2 months. There's no point in getting all annoyed or pissed off by your own optimism. <-- Something that I have to chant to myself to retain my sanity.


URGH.


Sigh.


Another thing is that I wonder why cant everybody live in peace. Why cant we forgive and forget. Why cant we all just let things go, and not harp on matters long gone.


Before anyone that reads this blog and think that I'm talking about them, don't worry, I'm just talking about things in general. There are alot of matters recently that ignited this feeling in me.


Anyway, isnt it better to live happily? Isnt it better to live a life without so much angst, so much anger?


And before I contradict myself, I know I might get annoyed (points to the stuff all above) at times, or get pissed off at other times, but the annoyance and anger just flows outta me once I get them outta my system, and I go back to my happy tralala world.


I forget stuff, and in time, I forgive as I forget. The different levels of annoyance/hurt/anger just takes different lengths of time to be forgotten.


My brain is already satuarated enough with an overflowing amount of stuff, important and mundane, facts and gossips. It seems that it takes alot of energy to be angry, to remember all the matters that made me so pissed off, and I get so tired of trying to remember why I got so annoyed, so I just let things go.


It's easier that way, you know? Just rant, and let go. Rant, and let go.


Fewer number of wrinkles added to your face too.


I know everyone's different, and I cant expect everyone to live their lives like how I live mine. And that's why I'm marvelling and wondering. =)